Unlike Taxotere, my previous chemo cocktail made me feel extremely nauseated, and I used to keep my stomach topped up with saltine crackers day after day just to keep the sickness at bay.
Not so this time around. I’m watching myself with a mix of bemusement and horror as my appetite routinely drives me out of bed and back to the kitchen at 11pm for something more to eat. This, at a time when getting out of bed requires a pretty massive effort. I can put away three square meals before noon. And not just anything – I have very specific cravings: fried egg sandwiches, tuna-and-bean salad, a scoop of salmon pie, egg noodles with Hungarian chicken sauce… One day I actually craved – and procured and devoured – two calzones.
I’m getting vicious acid reflux and enduring squirming, liquefied guts – but that doesn’t stop me from fanatically indulging the whims of this crazy appetite. It’s a little disconcerting, not just because it’s so frenzied, but because to be honest, ballooned and bald isn’t really the look I’m striving for.
And who craves calzones?
It was actually the calzones that tipped me off: The steroids are clearly running the show. I guess most people taking steroids need the extra fuel for all the iron-pumping and muscle-building they’re so serious about, whereas I’m just serious about getting through the day.
Now pass the macaroni and cheese before I get you in a full nelson and take it from you by force.