There Be NO ADDITIONAL Dragons!!!

Results from the bone & CT scans are in, and apart from the neck bumps THERE ARE NO MORE SPOTS!  My husband and I were hugging and crying in my doctor’s office (out of happiness and relief for a change) as she went through the reports one by one: chest cavity, lungs, liver, pelvis… everywhere.  Or rather, NOWHERE!

 

It is the best news I could have hoped for; it has changed my world.  I can fight this, now I know I can.  I was steeling myself for the worst, but I never really expected the best.  Now I feel like shouting from the rooftops: Get out of my way, stupid neck lumps! Prepare to meet your demise, stupid metastasized cancer!

 

I don’t think this happened all on its own.  I think there were too many people targeting their prayers and hope and good thoughts my way.  I have come to believe in the power of remote, collective prayer – or remote, collective non-denominational good mojo of any kind.

 

Yesterday I was e-mailing with a family friend in Manitoba who’s known me since I was a kid, and who also happens to be a priest.  He said his prayer group was stepping up their efforts for me.  And then he sent me a link to what he called my “new theme song.”  Stick some ear-buds in and crank it up:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Us-TVg40ExM

 

Of course I cried the whole way through the video, thinking of all the people standing by me, close to home and far away – and if there were a word bigger than grateful, more affirmative than hopeful, and less over-used than empowered, that might get close to how I’m feeling right now.

 

Please stay with me.  You’ll note that in the video there’s no fat lady marking the end of this, but it sure feels like we’ve got a fighting chance of stomping those dragons and throwing a party right on top of that pile of stinking scales.  That’s the day I’m fighting for, starting now. 

 

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18 Comments

Filed under Living with Breast Cancer

18 responses to “There Be NO ADDITIONAL Dragons!!!

  1. jules

    Excellent News!!!
    YEA!! i’m very relieved and smiling through the
    tears at this moment…

    You can beat the stupid neckbump dragon!
    & i’m looking forward to that party!

    fight like a girl
    jules

  2. angela

    I held my breath for you, I was waiting to read a post about results before emailing. I am so relieved, you have really been through the ringer the past few weeks. It is pouring rain today, go out and dance in it and wash away all the dread. angela

  3. Linda

    I’m relieved and happy for you Leanne! I often read your blog, but seldom comment. You’re truly an inspiration. I had a benign breast lump removed many years ago – then more lumpy breasts followed – such a hassle – decided to ignore my latest lump until I read your blog (about “lumpy lefty”). Reading your blog has encouraged me to stop procrastinating and go in for yet another diagnostic mammogram. All the best to you and your family.

  4. Corrie

    Okay..I just jumped out of my seat, cheered and cried like I was watching some sporting event and you just scored an amazing goal!!!

    I am so happy for you Leanne.

    I have been wanting to post a comment for awhile now, and I am so excited to be posting after such amazing news.

    Like everyone else, I have been touched by your words and have felt overwhelmingly privileged to have been invited along on your journey.
    Your courage alone, to document each step along this crazy road, has astounded me.

    I told Shana that I was begging the Universe for good news today. And, I think you are right..I think the Universe heard everyone’s voice. The voices of friends, family, “sisters” and even old High School chums….

    Congratulations Leanne.

    Now it is time to celebrate with that beautiful family of yours!

    xxoo
    Corrie

  5. Catherine

    Hallelujah – celebrate all you can as we celebrate with you!!! We will be with you every step of the way!!!! Even though you cannot see us, we are right there with you adding our positive thoughts and prayers.

  6. Sleepless in San Francisco

    Tears of joy for you and the Amazing Army who support you!

  7. Eva

    I am so happy for you Leanne!I hope you will fight always and never give up anything!You will win!Love from Eva

  8. Sandra

    Yes! Yes! Yes! FANTASTIC news!!!
    (I’d been holding my breath)
    Will definitely drink to this one thinking of you!
    Hugs,
    S.

  9. geminigirl

    Leanne,

    I am crying happy tears AND smiling at your awesome news. You can slay the “stupid neckbump dragon”!

    There is so much in this world we cannot, and do not understand. I don’t know what I believe in, but I am grateful and appreciative for any and all the support offered.

    One piece of the dragon at a time…til it’s gone!

    Gemini

  10. Jane Hall

    YES!!! I can finally breath now. I am sitting here with tears of relief running down my cheeks and a huge shit-eating grin… a grin with very sharp teeth. A grin that will help you bite, chew and spit out that stupid neckbump dragon til there is nothing left! I’ll be cyber-chewing right along with you… kick butt Leanne!

  11. Patrick

    Whew…Corrie, Robbie and I are so happy!!!!!!!!!!

  12. tricia

    oh happy happy happy day.
    la la la la la la
    oh happy happy happy day!
    xot

  13. Mary Lou

    What wonderful news! The power of thought and prayers and “women power” can do wonders. You are a powerful women and I have only met a few.

    Mary Lou

  14. Да,aleks,побороть лениться, фактически изредка неимоверно сложно..

  15. Katie

    I am so happy for you right now! What amazing news!!!!

    That “Stand By Me” video gives me chills every time I watch/listen to it. It is so inspiring to feel like you are part of something bigger and more powerful than any one person can be on their own.

  16. Lisa Dunn

    
    Leanne:

    That is is terrific news about your bone scan and CAT scan. Ironically, I had a bone scan and CAT scan too last week, but don’t get the results until my regular appointment on Friday. Hopefully I get some good news too, as I have many dragons to slay.

    I had posted a comment earlier on July 3 and you had asked about my situation. Here is my story in brief. I started having a lot of joint pain in Nov. ’08 but it was just brushed off as post-pregnancy pain. After several misdiagnoses and 3 months of pain so bad I could barely walk, my doctor sent me for a bone scan in February to rule out rheumatoid arthritis. The very next day she called and said, “I have some really bad news and you need to bring your husband with you.” The bone scan revealed widespread cancer throughout my bones. The next day I was
    in the hospital for a mammogram and a CAT scan to determine the primary site, and it turned out to be breast cancer. Unfortunately, they also found a few small spots on my liver. I am hormone positive, but HER2 negative.

    So within a week I started chemo and have also had 3 radiation treatments. Everything happened so fast that I have barely had time to process it.

    I have struggled mostly with the fact that the cancer was caught so late. I mean I didn’t even get to start at stage 1 – I was immediately thrown into Stage IV, average life expectancy of 2 years. How did I miss a tumour that was 5 cm?? But every single doctor I have seen has assured me that if I had told them I felt a lump in my breast (which I didn’t), they would have just said, “Oh
    it’s a blocked duct” as I had just recently had a baby.

    So here I am, 36 years old, with cancer. I have read all of your old blogs and I can relate to so much that has happened to you. I feel like an oddball when I go the Cancer Centre and sit there surrounded by a much older demographic. From what you have written it is clear that you have faced your battle with honesty and humour (I laughed so hard I cried when I read your blog about
    the tips for after treatment). I hope I can do the same.

    I think that my husband, kids and the rest of my family are the biggest thing getting me through each day. They keep me positive and prevent me from going to those scary places in my head too often. My sons are only 21/2 and 11 months, so they don’t really understand what is going on. The oldest knows that mommy goes to the doctor a lot and now has some “new hair” that sits on a stand on my dresser 🙂

    Good luck with your continuing treatment. I look forward to continuing to read your blog and reading about your success in fighting this stupid disease!

    Take care,
    Lisa

  17. kdaley

    I’m so happy for you…. Keep fighting. There are lots of people thinking of you.

  18. lcoppen

    This little collection of cheers and encouragement is like those extra points you can rack up to extend the life of your avatar when you’re playing video games — today I felt like my chutzpah-o-meter was waning and then I went back to read these comments and now I’m recharged. Maybe not fully recharged but enough to stay in the game.

    (Friends read these Lord Of the Rings or video game of analogies and say “I had no idea you were actually a 13 year old boy.”)

    LISA DUNN: My god woman I cannot believe your story! When you first said you “recently had a baby” I was thinking maybe a year ago. But no, this all happened to you when your baby was bran-spanking new! I cannot imagine how you cope with the stress of being a mother to a baby and a toddler on top of all your treatment. I imagine your family must be incredibly supportive. I hope so. However you are doing it, just keep doing it.
    And I hope you don’t go to those scary places very often. I know avoiding them is easier said than done, but every time I go there (last night in hospital for example) I have a crappy time. All those demons, all those unhappy thoughts…It’s an energy sucker. A total buzz kill.

    Also, where do you live? I know Rethink Breast Cancer in Toronto has a support group starting in September for moms of young kids — support for you and child-care for your kids on Saturdays. I’m signing myself up. Check out the link if you’re interested: http://www.rethinkbreastcancer.com/ Maybe there’s something similar in your area?? Or maybe you already have something like that on the go or maybe you just aren’t interested in anything like that right now. No problem, whichever way.

    Just wanted to thank you for sharing your story. Stay strong, hang on to the hope and keep fighting — I promise to try to do all three myself!
    -Leanne

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